Outplay Your Haters

Dear lovely people,

First things first, a hater is not worth your precious time. You’ve got too much going on in your head and too much to do about your future than spend time bordering over what a hater has to think or say.  An unknown author states clearly “Some people have so little going on in their lives, they would rather discuss yours.” So do you really need to border?

By the way, a hater can be anyone. A family member, a friend, a colleague, a teacher, a boss, or some random person you meet on the street or the Internet. People who were friends forever can suddenly be haters. Most of them are invisible, anonymous, just trying to get in your head because that’s their modus operandi. You have to be equipped with the necessary tools to deal with it.

It’s true that when you have a dream, nothing feels more deflating than to endure the criticisms of others. Some people, no matter how hard you try, aren’t interested in your vision, and will do anything to convince you otherwise. Yet, like Shannon L. Alde says, “you will face your greatest opposition when you are closest to your biggest miracle.” Anytime you try to do something great with your life, there are always going to be others trying to bring you down.

The problem in most cases is not the hater but rather how you react to it determines whether you are winning or not. “Learn to use the criticism as fuel and you will never run out of energy.” Says Orrin Woodward. No matter what they say, you can use their negativity to further your own success if you want.

Fact number 1: They wouldn’t hate on your dream if it wasn’t big enough to make them worry. By their need to criticize you, they’re showing their own vulnerability. If someone is making you feel bad because of your dream, it’s because they’re projecting their own anxiety and guilt on to you, so they are relieved of their own situation. Stand tall, because you’re on the right track.

Fact number 2: Your dream is not their dream. They might disagree and argue with you, but ultimately, this is your dream. Don’t lower your expectations to compensate for their inability to see things the same way as you. Instead, listen to what cautionary words they might have to say, and take them seriously. But, if you feel like your dream is too important despite its fallbacks, go for it! It’s your dream, and it’s you who will feel the unhappiness if you don’t bring your life to fruition. Dream big, but get things done progressively!

Fact number 3: Haters are inevitable. With so many diverse perspectives in the world, it’s inevitable that you’ll eventually face discord. When I first wanted to change my career, lots of people told me I was making a grave mistake. Yet, with enough hard work and determination, I took the dive, and I’m so happy I did! Facing discerning attitudes from anyone is certain, but one thing is not: whether you’ll allow their judgment to mortify you, or motivate you.

Shannon L Alder says “One of the most powerful lessons in life is to recognize that no one can give you power, and many people don’t want you to have it. You have to find the courage to seize it, own it and hold on!”